I work with somebody who is 40 years my senior, and we have grown close over the years. I call him "Grampa" as a term of endearment and he has not objected to that. One day, however, I was called by our HR Manager and was accused of age discrimination! I was flabbergasted to say the least, and I explained that it was a term of endearment and was not meant to offend anyone. I was given a written warning for it. Was it fair?

Well, yes. What's wrong with his name? You and your more senior co-worker might know that it is a term of endearment, but other people might not, as in the case of your HR manager. I think that an analogy is that if you call somebody "hot" that could be construed as a sexist comment and what you have is an ageist comment.

I think that your HR manager over-reacted. But the company is required to ensure that nobody is discriminated against by virtue of their ages.

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There should be common sense. Discrimination is only discrimination if malice was there and your comment was meant to deter your colleagues from working.

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I am the Dreamer!

I think it's great that you have a good relationship with your co-workers... but because employment laws are subject to interpretation, and your HR interpreted it that way, it might be best for you to follow what they decreed. It may not be gender discrimination in your case per se, but it could start other people to call their colleagues names.

For me, I think you got the raw end of the deal. There is a difference between calling somebody "grampa" as a term of endearment and calling somebody "grampa" in an effort to belittle them. Laws are laws, but the interpretation should take into consideration if harm was meant in it!

I think your senior boss should also be called and asked if he was offended in any way by you calling him grampa. If not, then there is no sense in giving you a warning. Nonetheless, they have mentioned that laws are laws and that it is subject to anyone's interpretation and in your case by your HR manager.

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On one hand, grampa is really not offensive. So there should be no case for you there. Grampa is like calling somebody bro or pop... that just does not make sense that your HR thought it's offensive.

Agreed. There has to be a certain degree of malice for it to be discrimination.

I agree with other posters, it certainly seems like an over reaction but one well within their rights..

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Cath xx
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